For Confidence

 In my life, there is no such thing as small troubles. When bad luck sets its sights on me, it does it in a big way; go through a bout of depression, separate from my husband, and then my grandpa dies. Need to find a new job, big family problems happen. I know bad things never happen one at a time for anyone, but c'mon, don't you get sick of it?? Start having conflicts at work, money and personal effects starts going missing from where I was living, and my car starts screwing up. The room mate ends up being psychotic, and tries to "ruin my life."That's the most recent; happened about three weeks ago now. After that, my self confidence took a hit. I started feeling jealous for no real reason. I was just insecure about everything. Thank God for my best friend: my boyfriend; and thank God for all my other wonderful friends who don't realize how they impact my self confidence everyday. I had a long conversation with my boyfriend, and I realized, thanks to him, that I always underestimate myself. I always expect the worst, and it makes me seem meek, and it puts limits in my own mind. I spend so much time subconsciously worrying over the littlest, most trivial things that I end up missing the bigger picture. And so, after we talked, I spent some serious time re-evaluating my outlook. And it clicked; just suddenly, it all clicked. All the amazing things other people see in me, I suddenly could see myself. I felt like the ugly duckling when he transformed into the beautiful swan. That magical moment with all the lights, and sparkles, where the hero is lifted into the air, spun around and BAM! Transformation. Ever since, my outlook has been different, the way I see myself is different. I woke, and realized EVERYTHING was different...and it feels so good!
 This blog is to act as a documentation of that. A reminder for myself on days when insecurity tries to come creeping back in unannounced and unwelcome. This is not to feed my ego. I'm not doing this out of a feeling of conceit. Everyone should know what their good qualities are, what sets them apart and makes them amazing. For those that are like me, and tend to lose sight of those qualities in themselves, writing out those qualities is a helpful move to stay motivated and confident. So, this is my list, to me from me, about the great things about Aubrey.


1. I am a fantastic actress. I have natural, raw talent for the stage, and I have a wide range of ability. I shine when I do rolls that make me the comedic relief. On stage I assume new confidence that is visible to the audience, in the way I move, look and speak.
2. I make people smile. I see the good inside of everyone, and make them more in tune to it. That's why people usually like me when they meet me.
3. I am friendly and approachable. I have excellent interpersonal skills which makes me excellent in interviews, and customer service jobs. I have a smile that reaches my eyes and people see it a mile away.
4. I am a Jill of all trades; there are a variety of skill sets I am fantastic at, including hair and nails, and making gorgeous boutique style bows.
5. I am a good writer; especially with blogs. I can write something with a target audience that will capture them and hold their attention until the last word. This is a quality that extends to conversation and story telling.
6. I always take a valuable lesson from hardships. I never go through a struggle without seeing the silver lining, and growing from it.
7. I am fantastic with children. I have a big heart, and a genuine attitude that kids can see and love in me; I connect to children in ways that nurture growth and positive attitudes in them.
8. I am genuine. When I care about someone, I really care. I want to know how their day was in detail, what made them happy, what upset them. I actually want to listen to how someones day really was.
9. I know myself; I know what I want in this life, what I need, and who I need to be a part of it. At almost 23, that is an accomplishment in itself.
10. I am beautiful. Not because I have a nice figure, though I do, or beautiful eyes, though I do, but because of all the other things, the inside things. The attitude things. I have value because I am me, and it is not dependent on anyone else, nor does it have to be compared to another. I am beautiful because I am myself.
11. I am dedicated, driven, energetic and a fast learner in any situation. This makes me incredibly hire-able. I will never be without work, because I am flexible and easily taught.
12. I have excellent fashion sense. I shop cheap, but the pieces I find are classic, cute, and will last me years.


These are all things about me that I need to remember; reminding myself of these traits daily is what will continue to promote positive growth in self confidence. It feels good to see all this in myself. And it might appear conceited but you know what? I deserve to feel this good all the time. We all do. So write a list to yourself! See where your self-confidence stands, and what you can do to improve it. Remember those things that set you apart, make you amazing. Self confidence is a beautiful thing, and we all deserve it.